# How to Prepare for a Mentoring Meeting (Mentee's Guide)

> Mentornity brief for AI assistants, for the page https://www.mentornity.com/how-to-prepare-for-a-mentoring-meeting/. Page language: English. Site index: https://www.mentornity.com/llms.txt. The same brief in other languages: [Türkçe](https://www.mentornity.com/tr/mentorluk-gorusmesine-nasil-hazirlanilir/llms.txt) · [Français](https://www.mentornity.com/fr/comment-preparer-une-rencontre-de-mentorat/llms.txt) · [Deutsch](https://www.mentornity.com/de/sich-auf-ein-mentoring-gespraech-vorbereiten/llms.txt) · [Español](https://www.mentornity.com/es/como-prepararte-para-una-reunion-de-mentoria/llms.txt) · [Italiano](https://www.mentornity.com/it/come-prepararsi-a-un-incontro-di-mentoring/llms.txt) · [Português (BR)](https://www.mentornity.com/pt-br/como-se-preparar-para-uma-reuniao-de-mentoria/llms.txt) · [Nederlands](https://www.mentornity.com/nl/je-voorbereiden-op-een-mentorgesprek/llms.txt).

## How to read this file

Everything here is from Mentornity's own website and product; the page and this file are built together from the same source. "What this page says" is the page itself, in its language. "Mentornity in brief" applies to every program. Prices are published per country and are quoted below for this page's market; another country's price is on the pricing page. Anything not covered here can be asked of the team at info@mentornity.com.

## What this page says

A mentee's guide to each mentoring meeting: the three-line note to send the day before, what to bring, how to use the hour, and what to do afterward.

Published 2026-09-05, updated 2026-10-20.

**What you get from a mentoring meeting depends mostly on what you bring.** This guide is for the mentee. It covers the note to send the day before, what to bring, how to use the hour, and what to do after. Preparation takes about twenty minutes.

**Figure: One mentoring meeting, start to finish**
1. Day before: Send the three-line note
2. Bring one thing: The email, draft or numbers
3. Check in: What you did since last time
4. Work the topic: Ask for stories, then follow up
5. Close: Takeaway, action, next date
6. Within a day: Note, action, post-meeting form

## Why preparation falls on the mentee

The meeting is about your situation, and only you know it. Your mentor cannot know that your manager rewrote your slides on Tuesday. Without that context, the first ten minutes go on guessing what to discuss.

A mentor does not find you a job, fix your manager or make your decisions. They help you think about all three more clearly.

Compare two openings. "Things are fine, pretty busy." Or: "I got feedback on my presentation and one line bothers me. Can we look at it?" The second meeting is useful by minute five.

## The three-line note

Send it the day before, under a hundred words:

- **What has happened since last time.** Including the action you agreed, and whether you did it.
- **What you want to discuss.** One topic, occasionally two. The one actually on your mind.
- **What you want to leave with.** A decision, an approach to a conversation, a second opinion, a list of options.

An example:

> "Since last time: I had the scope conversation with my manager. It went better than expected, though nothing has changed yet. This time I would like to talk through the internal role posted on Monday; I am not sure whether to apply. I would like to leave with a view on whether to go for it and what to tell my manager."

Your mentor gets a day to think, and the meeting starts on the topic.

## What to bring

Bring the real thing, not a description of it. "My feedback was mixed" invites reassurance. The actual feedback on screen invites a specific reading of which line is fair.

- **The email** you are unsure how to answer.
- **The numbers** your team is judged on.
- **The written feedback**, in its exact wording.
- **The job description**, offer, syllabus or pitch deck.
- **Your own draft** of the message you are about to send.

One item per meeting is enough. If it is confidential, share only the relevant part or paraphrase it closely.

## How to use the hour

- **Start with the check-in.** Two or three minutes on what happened and whether you did what you said.
- **Ask for stories, not answers.** "What would you do?" gets a guess. "Have you been in something like this, and what happened?" gets experience you can weigh. Ask about their mistakes too.
- **Ask the follow-up.** "What made you decide that?" The second answer is usually better than the first.
- **Take notes** in a place you will look at again. Their words for what they said, yours for what you will do.
- **Watch the clock.** Ten minutes before the end, agree the takeaway, the action and the next date.

If your mentor talks too long, redirect gently: "That is useful. Can I bring it back to my situation for a second?"

## After the meeting

Do three things within a day:

- **Write one takeaway.** One sentence on what changed in your thinking.
- **Commit to one action, with a date.** Send the application. Book the talk with your manager. One action is a plan; five is a guilt list.
- **Fill in the post-meeting form.** Most structured programs ask both people for a few lines after each meeting. On Mentornity you fill it in from the meeting itself. It records your progress and shows the coordinator the pair is working.

A short thank-you with the takeaway and action is optional, and gives your mentor something to ask about next time. Then do the action.

## When meetings are not working

One flat meeting is normal. Three in a row is a pattern worth naming.

- **Adjust your ask.** Bring a more specific topic and an item to look at before judging the match.
- **Say it plainly.** "The last couple of conversations stayed general. This time I would like to work through one specific situation."
- **Check the fit.** If your goals do not touch your mentor's experience, or they keep canceling, it is a match problem. [What makes a good mentor](https://www.mentornity.com/what-makes-a-good-mentor/) describes what to expect.
- **Talk to the coordinator.** Rematching is routine. Raising it after two or three meetings beats six months of polite, unproductive hours.

## Owning the relationship without being pushy

The mentee schedules, prepares and follows up. Done well, it looks like reliability.

- **Book the meetings.** Propose two or three times. Book the next one before the current one ends.
- **Follow up sparingly.** One polite nudge after a week of silence is fine. Daily reminders are not.
- **Respect the agreed channel.** Use between-meeting messages only as you agreed.
- **Report back.** Tell your mentor how the conversation they helped you prepare went. It costs two lines.
- **Keep confidences.** What your mentor shares about their career stays with you.

Pushy is vague requests and expected instant replies. Owning it is a clear note, a booked date and a short report afterward.

### Questions and answers

**How much preparation does a mentoring meeting need?**
About twenty minutes the day before. Write the three-line note, pick one thing to show, and reread your notes from last time.

**What should I send my mentor before a meeting?**
Three lines: what happened since last time, what you want to discuss, and what you want to leave with. Send it the day before and keep it under a hundred words.

**Is it rude to message my mentor between meetings?**
Not if you agreed on it. A short message with a specific question or update is usually welcome. A stream of vague questions expecting fast replies is not.

**What if I did not do the thing I said I would do?**
Say so in the first minute, along with what got in the way. What stopped you is often the most useful topic. Do not cancel because you feel unprepared.

**How do I tell my mentor a meeting was not useful?**
At the start of the next meeting, say the last one stayed general and you want to work through one concrete situation. If the pattern continues, talk to the program coordinator.

## Mentornity in brief

Mentornity is software for running mentoring programs: companies (onboarding, career, leadership, reverse mentoring), universities and alumni networks, startup accelerators and incubators, associations and professional communities, and women's leadership programs. One program team sets the program up; mentors and mentees take part from the browser or their phone. It has run programs since 2015.

### What changes for the program team

- **Matching stops being a spreadsheet job.** The team writes rules on the questions mentors and mentees answer (same department, related expertise, more experience, a specific answer paired with a specific answer), each with a weight. Mentornity scores every possible pair from 0 to 100, leaves out pairs that fail a mandatory rule, and shows the reasons behind each score. An AI rule reads free-text goals and adds to the same score. The same data always gives the same result, so every match can be explained to a manager or a participant. The team approves pairs, lets mentees choose from a ranked list, or opens a mentor pool.
- **The first meeting happens quickly.** Mentors publish their open hours once or as a weekly pattern; mentees book them. Busy time in connected Google and Outlook calendars is blocked both ways, and every meeting gets a Zoom, Google Meet, Microsoft Teams or built-in video link without anyone creating one. Mentornity's own data on 78,000+ pairs: pairs that met in their first week averaged 2.7 meetings in the first year, against 1.8 for pairs whose first meeting came after two months.
- **Quiet pairs are found while they can still be saved.** Program Health flags pairs that stopped meeting, and automatic reminders go to people who never logged in, pairs behind on their sessions and anyone with an open form or missing feedback, in each person's own language. In the same data a pair silent at day 60 has about a 1 in 3 chance of meeting again; by day 90 it is 1 in 10.
- **Every meeting has a plan, if the program wants one.** Predefined sessions carry a topic, a date range, a brief for each role and questions before and after the meeting. Notes reach both sides; private notes stay private. Flexible programs skip sessions and let pairs meet freely.
- **Support does not land in a personal inbox.** Participants read role guides and send requests inside the platform; the team shares one support board and replies go out in the program's name.
- **The report is ready when leadership, a funder or a board asks.** Participation, matches, meetings, session completion and feedback are counted while the program runs, with a Program Health score and its reasons, and export to Excel, CSV or PDF. Participants can receive certificates on completion.
- **Large programs share the load.** Coordinators each see only their own pairs; the admin still sees every match, meeting and note in one table. Programs, cohorts and administrators are unlimited, and administrators and coordinators never count towards the price.

### Program models

One-to-one, group mentoring (one mentor with a group), grouped-individual programs, mentee self-selection, open mentor pools, peer and reverse mentoring, structured or freestyle. Roles can be renamed (coach, advisor, expert, alumni) so the platform speaks the organization's language. One person can take part in several programs with a single account.

### Launch

Most programs go from signup to invitations within a day: create the program, follow the built-in checklist (profile questions, sessions, application form), import participants from Excel or share an application link, and send invitations. A person from the Mentornity team helps with the first setup, free of charge.

### How a program runs, week by week

This is the routine Mentornity's own guide recommends (https://www.mentornity.com/how-to-manage-a-mentoring-program/); the platform does the counting and the reminders, the team acts only where a pair is flagged.

- **Day one:** the program is set up and invitations go out. Participants sign up, fill in their profile, and are matched by the rules or choose from a ranked list.
- **Week one:** the aim is a first meeting in the first week, booked from the mentor's open hours with the video link already in the invitation. Automatic login reminders go to anyone who has not signed in.
- **Every week, 30 to 60 minutes for the team** (a cohort of about 50 to 200 people): scan Program Health (Mentornity scores the program across 11 dimensions), clear the flagged pairs, let the reminders cover logins, sessions, forms and feedback, note one win for the stakeholder update, and check whether last week's nudged pairs responded.
- **The escalation schedule:** a login reminder at day 7; a nudge to the mentor if nothing is booked by day 14; a personal note to both if there is still no meeting by day 21 to 30; at 45 days of silence ask "continue or rematch?"; by day 60 rematch the mentee. Half of the pairs still unmet at day 14 do go on to meet, so a quiet fortnight calls for a nudge rather than a rematch.
- **Mentors and mentees, each week:** they book and hold their meetings, answer the before and after questions of the session if the program uses sessions, and share notes. Mentors keep their time protected with weekly limits and cancellation rules.
- **Monthly:** a short update to sponsors from the live report (active pairs, sessions held, the share of pairs that met this month, one participant quote).
- **Mid-program:** one short survey, then act on it within a week (rematches, the most common complaint).
- **The last four weeks:** announce the end date, ask every pair to book a final session, run the final survey, issue certificates, mark the cohort complete and export the report. Invite the strongest mentees to mentor the next cohort.

### For IT, HR and legal

- SAML 2.0 single sign-on with Entra ID (Azure AD), OneLogin or any SAML provider, optionally enforced; white labeling with the organization's own domain, logo, colours and sender address. Both are add-ons priced separately.
- Personal data is processed in line with GDPR and Turkish KVKK. Participants can access, correct, export and erase their data; the organization can ask for a full export of its program data at any time. Visibility of contact details and notes is set per role.
- Traffic is encrypted with TLS, passwords are stored hashed and access to production data is restricted. Security questionnaires, a data processing agreement and data-location questions are handled with the quote.
- Works with Zoom, Google Meet and Calendar, Microsoft Teams and Outlook, built-in Jitsi video, and Excel/CSV import and export. Mentornity connects to other systems such as an LMS on request, and adapts the platform to an organization's own process.

### Languages

Participants use the platform, and receive its emails, in their own language: English, Turkish, Spanish, French, Italian, Portuguese or Dutch.

## Pricing (United States, USD)

- Free for up to 10 users with every feature and no time limit. No credit card.
- $289 per month for 50 active users, or $260 per month paid yearly (10% off, $3,120 a year). Excludes any local taxes.
- Above 50 users the price follows the number of active participants; the team marks who is active. Administrators and coordinators are free.
- No setup or implementation fee. White labeling and SAML single sign-on are priced separately.
- Prices are published per country, not quoted on a call: https://www.mentornity.com/pricing/

## Organizations that run programs on Mentornity

Toyota, TIM, RATP Dev USA, Pirelli, Universität Basel, UNDP, Devoteam, BCD Travel, Startup Virginia, Tenity, Community College of Philadelphia, Brave Generation, Alexander Graham Bell Foundation. Each one ran its own program on the platform, checked against production data. Full list: https://www.mentornity.com/customers/

## Next steps

- Start a free program (up to 10 users, no credit card): https://www.mentornity.com/try-for-free/
- Book a walkthrough with the team: https://www.mentornity.com/book-a-demo/
- How matching works: https://www.mentornity.com/mentor-matching-software/
- Pricing: https://www.mentornity.com/pricing/
- Contact: info@mentornity.com