Wish, Obstacle, Plan

What it is

A wish, an obstacle, a plan. Your mentee names a wish, the best outcome, the inner obstacle, and if-then plans.

When to send it

Send it when a goal keeps slipping. It fits a goal that matters but keeps getting put off.

• Put off againthe same goal, every week
• A first goalto set one that holds
• Before a pushan exam, a launch, a habit

Filling it in

Ten minutes, in three steps. Your wish, then the outcome and obstacle, then your plans.

1. Write your wish and rate itHow important it is, and how likely.
2. Picture the outcome, then the obstacleThe best part, then what inside you gets in the way.
3. Write your if-then plansAt least one, for when the obstacle shows up.

Reading the answers

Read the obstacle first. Check the obstacle is inside them: a habit, a feeling or a thought.

• The obstacleinside, not other people
• Feasibilityunder 5 suggests a smaller wish
• If-then plansat least one, up to five

Questions to ask

Ask when the obstacle shows up. People who ask follow-up questions are liked more (Huang and others, 2017).

• When is the obstacle most likely to show up?then: what happens just before?
• Is the “then” part small enough to do on the spot?then: what is the first move?
• Which plan will you try first this week?then: how will you know it worked?

Why it works

If-then plans help people act on their goals (Gollwitzer & Sheeran 2006). Adding the wish and the inner obstacle has a small to moderate effect, larger when done one to one (Wang et al. 2021).

Sources

• Gollwitzer & Sheeran (2006). Advances in Experimental Social Psychology, 38. Meta-analysis of if-then plans, 94 tests, d = 0.65.
• Wang, Wang & Gai (2021). Frontiers in Psychology, 12. Meta-analysis, 21 studies, N = 15,907, g = 0.34.

How a tool works on Mentornity

1. 1The mentor picks a tool from the library and sends it with a short message.
2. 2The mentee fills it in step by step; the answers are saved as they go.
3. 3Both see the answers, comment on any part and agree the next steps.
4. 4Only the two of them see the answers, not the program admins.

Guides for both sides

• Wish, Obstacle, Plan for MentorsFor mentors and coaches: when to send Wish, Obstacle, Plan, how to read the obstacle and the plans, which questions to ask and which plan to try first.
• Wish, Obstacle, Plan for MenteesFor mentees and coachees: what Wish, Obstacle, Plan is, how to fill it in, where to find it and what your mentor does with it.

More tools: Goals and action

• Conversation Map15 min

  Talk one topic through: where you are, where you want to be, what already works, and one first step.

• Goal Clarity Map20 min

  List what weighs on you, see how much of it you control, and turn one point into your goal for the programme.

• Decision Balance15 min

  Weigh one decision: what you and people close to you gain or lose, how you would feel about yourself, and how others would see it.

All tools →