Three Good Things

What it is

Three good things, every evening. Your mentee writes three things that went well today, and why each happened.

When to send it

Send it when weeks feel heavy. It helps when talks drift to what went wrong, or after a hard stretch.

• Heavy weeksa lot went wrong
• Problem talkevery meeting starts with trouble
• After a winto see what made it work

Filling it in

Ten minutes, in three steps. Write the good things, their causes, then what you noticed.

1. Write three good thingsSmall things count, like a good talk.
2. Add why each one happenedWhat caused it, and what you did.
3. Write what you noticedOptional: a pattern, a feeling, a surprise.

Reading the answers

Read the why, not only the what. The causes show what your mentee did to make good things happen.

• Good thingsthree, and small ones count
• With a causeeach one has its why
• What they noticedoptional, often the richest part

Questions to ask

Ask what surprised them. People who ask follow-up questions are liked more (Huang and others, 2017).

• Which of the three surprised you?then: why that one?
• How much of the “why” was down to you?then: what did you do?
• What could make one of these happen again?then: when could you try it?

Why it works

In the original study, people who did this every night for a week were happier a month later, mostly those who kept it up (Seligman et al. 2005). Across studies the effect is small to moderate (Bolier et al. 2013).

Sources

• Seligman, Steen, Park & Peterson (2005). Positive psychology progress: empirical validation of interventions. American Psychologist, 60(5), 410–421.
• Bolier et al. (2013). Meta-analysis of positive psychology interventions, 39 RCTs. BMC Public Health, 13, 119.

How a tool works on Mentornity

1. 1The mentor picks a tool from the library and sends it with a short message.
2. 2The mentee fills it in step by step; the answers are saved as they go.
3. 3Both see the answers, comment on any part and agree the next steps.
4. 4Only the two of them see the answers, not the program admins.

Guides for both sides

• Three Good Things for MentorsFor mentors and coaches: when to send Three Good Things, how to read the causes, which questions to ask and how to turn one into a step.
• Three Good Things for MenteesFor mentees and coachees: what Three Good Things is, how to fill it in, where to find it and what your mentor does with it.

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